| This is a new low in journalism, even for The Register. Here's my new Register story, see if you like it: 
 DATELINE Washington, DC
 Today the President MAY HAVE launched a new attack on the former Soviet Union. We haven't confirmed from any sources, but WOULDN'T IT be a disaster if he did?
 Nothing like spreading a little Fear, Uncertainty, and Doubt to cap off the day for The Register
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