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  The Idiots Are Coming
Time: 08:42 EST/13:42 GMT | News Source: Esquire | Posted By: Robert Stein

There's a good chance you've heard about the new software, or even downloaded the Consumer Preview to use in your parents' basement. But in case you haven't, a refresher: On October 26, Windows 8 will appear on new PCs. And for once, anyone can understand it — pretty much immediately. The start screen, which draws from Microsoft's clunkily named mobile software, Windows Phone 7, is a colorful grid of living tiles. Not little icons on a desktop accessed through a complicated multibranched start tree, but big squares and rectangles that take up the entire screen. Those tiles are constantly updating, cycling through the day's news, your messages, and any new food photos your friends post on Instagram. It's simple. An idiot's interface — kind of like those phones for grandparents with the buttons showing the faces of people they call most. Look for what you want, click it, and you're there. The only thing that needs to be smart is the computer. Not that Windows 8 feels dumbed down. More like streamlined. Intuitive. Click a tile and you're brought into the program. To dismiss it, just drag it off the screen. You can also relegate programs to a small updating bar off to the side. Returning to the start screen is just a matter of pushing the Windows key. If that's too hard to find, the screen corners also serve as hot spots. Bottom left for the start tiles. Upper left shows you the last program you were in, or slide the mouse down and choose from any program that's running in the background. To access settings (or share something on Facebook or Twitter), move the mouse to the right side of the screen. The search function may be the simplest option: From the start screen, just start typing. That'll automatically open the search bar and look through everything that's stored on your computer or can be accessed through any of your apps.

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